Letter to Ansh — 16: Purpose of Life

Dear Ansh

It is 5th of April 2020. Your mum and you were supposed to come back from India on 25th March, however the pandemic has basically thrown all travel off-kilter.

There is good news and bad news.

The good news is things are getting better in Australia, which seems to have got the situation under control. The bad news is things are getting steadily worse in India.

Although the hope is that the rising temperatures, new medical developments such as cures and vaccines will bring the situation under a modicum of control.

I wait for you and your mother to be reunited with me and I miss you both dearly.

Days like these lead you to ponder over that most important question of them all, what is the purpose of our lives? And to tell you the truth I have tried to think it through for a very long period of time.

While you must find the answers for yourselves and absolutely vet whatever I say here against the faculties of your reason, I would like to share with you what I think is the purpose of our lives.

When you were born about 3 years ago, you could barely move. You used to move your hands about in the air randomly, I used to think you move like a rapper.

So in order to help you sleep, we used to cocoon you in a nice little wrap and you used to go sleep.

Over the days, months and years you have learnt to crawl, walk, and now jump and run. Now you insist on eating yourselves and you can already count numbers and recite the alphabets.

It absolutely amazes me to see you bloom.

It’s almost like seeing a pre-planned masterpiece unfold out steadily in front of your eyes in slow motion.

Someday you might end up having kids of your own and you will share the same joy as I do now.

You are steadily becoming more and more independent, and more and more confident in your capabilities to navigate the world yourself.

You are well on the path to self realization.

And that self realization my friend is simply the purpose of life.

Self realization for you may mean a very different thing to you as it might mean to me. You may choose to become a painter or a novelist, or a shopkeeper or a farmer. As long as whatever you are doing keeps you happy and satisfied, you are realizing what you were meant to do. That is good enough.

At some point in time in our lives we all have to do things that others expect us to do. This usually comes in the following forms

1. Benevolent
2. Malevolent
3. Agnostic

When you are growing up your parents and teachers might tell you to not roll in the mud or eat icky things. Generally they are for your own good. For now you are stuck with that and you unfortunately have limited choice about it.

As you grow up a bit more, steadily that will reduce and you will be able to decide more and more about what is best for you. You will steadily gain more freedom.

Freedom is the prerequisite for self realization.

Your choices must be your own, and only then can you be truly meaningfully happy.

However not everyone who tries to force you to do things against your wishes, will have your best interests in mind.

They will employ force, often it will be physical. School yard bullying can take the form of physical violence.

When faced with such things you should always report it to the relevant authorities and also me. If I am physically capable of voluntary movement I will always come and sort the matter out for you.

However there could end up being scenarios where neither me nor any stronger benevolent authority is in a position to intercede in real time.

You must prepare for such scenarios by self strengthening, do not be at the mercy of the strong. Rather develop enough strength yourself so that not only is no one able to bully you, but you are also in a position to assist and protect others.

The other form of bullying is non physical. It will take the form of emotional manipulation. People will try and tease, scorn, belittle, and do all varieties of actions that are meant to bend you to their will.

This may involve the process of fitting in.

For instance, you could face peer pressure to do drugs, or smoke or do any other such activities that might not be in your self interest. But you might feel compelled to do that as it is deemed to be the “cool” thing to do and you do not want to stick out.

Or someone who you look upto, or someone whom you deeply care about wants you to do things that you do not want to do.

In both cases take a step back, and ask yourself is this what I really want to do. And if the cost of my association with the person or persons who is asking me to do this is something I do not want to do, is it worth being around with such people.

Always place your own self interest firm and center, and be surrounded by people who help you achieve that aim of self realization. If someone around you is trying to move you away from that goal, you should perhaps think about moving away from them.

Self interest is not a bad thing. You might want to work at a non profit that helps solve hunger in the world. You are still acting in your own self interest.

Working at such a place makes you happy and fulfilled, and hence it is in your self interest. Self interest furthers us on the path to self realization.

Now coming to the agnostic scenario, where you are doing something you do not enjoy for someone else. However that party is neither benevolent nor malevolent. This can be working a job that you do not enjoy but you need the money. Your employer is not trying to make you happy or exploit you unduly.

He just is paying you money in return of your services.

Often times most people will get stuck in such scenarios for the entirety of their lives, where they do not achieve financial freedom.

It is very hard to achieve self realization if you do not have one or the other form of freedom to make your own choices about what you want to do. Financial freedom is an important enabler on the path to self realization.

Educate yourself on money, I have also written a few letters to you on this specific topic. Think about how best you can achieve financial freedom and act on it.

The purpose of life is self realization, and it can only be achieved if you have the freedom to walk on that path.

That freedom has several dimensions which include physical, emotional and financial.

Exercise, eat healthy food, be self aware, make decisions based on reason and not because someone said so. Understand how money works and make it work for you.

Do these things and you will be on the path to self realization.

Walking on that path to self realization is simply the purpose of life.

Your loving father

Moresh